Monthly Archives: April 2006

A Sea of Drunk Teenagers

pic Marc Vallée

West End off licences almost ran out of alcopops yesterday as almost 10,000 teenagers turned up in Trafalgar Sqaure to attend the anti-fascist Love Music Hate Racism concert.

‘Fuck the BNP’ and ‘have you got any ID?’ were the slogans of the day as freshfaced schoolkids proceeded to attempt to drink Soho dry.

Belle & Sebastian, Lethal Bizzle and The Mentalists were some of the artists who appeared with some inspired VJing from the void’s mates over at punkvert.tv

Trying to avoid cynicism and hope that the kids didn’t just turn out to see Pete Doherty live on stage the few grizzled old crusties who made the day generally agreed it was a good thing … though it’s unlikely to happen again after the state the Square was left in.

Those who did turn up to see Doherty will have remained disappointed as he was unable to make it due to his arrest over the decidely dodgy pic which featured in the Scum recently.

Now any self-respecting junkie is unlikely to give a hit to someone already on the nod, it’s a waste of perfectly good drugs and quite likely attempted murder.

Many have speculated that Doherty was in fact removing the needle, or even that Doherty himself staged the pic to wind up the tabloids.

In any event the arrest meant yet another no-show for Doherty, not that those in the Square seemed to mind or even notice, many were in the fountain by the time Babyshambles were due to play.

Mayday Update

Seems some are ignoring Richard (see below) and organising a SOCPA protest on Mayday this year after all.

http://www.parliamentprotest.org.uk/

Pledgebankers bottle out

“I will form part of a human chain around the Westminster no protest zone but only if 6,000 other people will join in.”

— Richard

Well 6,000 people din’t sign up but almost a thousand did and judging from the comments were more than up for some kind of naughtiness come mayday.

But it appear the mysterious Richard has sent an e-mail to one and all saying that this action will now not be happening on mayday. A comment left on the site reads

“As early as December someone submitted a comment asking if the action would occur on May Day. Richard failed to clarify and since he was not taking an active role others started tentatively planning things based on the assumption that it would. Still Richard maintained his silence. Then with just 10 days to go he basically tells us that the pledge was never intended to occur on May Day.”

The pledge is to be extended until next January by which time SOCPA will have been extended to the whole of the inside of the M25 and the void will probably be writing this from a work camp.

After all, why take this action on mayday, when the police resources will be stretched thinly, journos are everywhere and there’ll be thousands on the streets who may be able to help.

We think it’s a cop out, and wonder if Richard’s been got at.

The void calls all disaffected pledgebankers to join the autonomous bloc on the TUC march. Meet at 12 noon, Clerkenwell Green EC1.

John Reid … closet toker?

Where did I leave that fuckin’ blim?

The answer to how defence secretary John Reid is able to sleep at night has been revealed this morning as it is confirmed that hashish has been found at his house in Scotland.

Clumsy Reid must have dropped a blim on the carpet before jetting off to Afghanistan recently to pick up some more.

When busted Reid relied on the old favourite ‘never seen it before in me life guv’ claiming it must have been there before since before he moved in adding ‘you ain’t got any king skins ‘ave yer geezer?’

Cops will not be prosecuting Reid and have swallowed his story wholehearedly with one telling the void ‘aye well it’s one rule for them and one for us pal.’

Meanwhile hippy Reid has added Nepal, Pakistan and India to his tour and is said to be planning to visit Morocco on his way back to the UK.

Both David Cameron and George Osborne have been in touch asking him to pick something up for them as well.

Cannabis found at John Reid home

Rosie Winterton Announces Shake up of Mental Health Nurses

Mental health campaigners have welcomed a shake-up of mental health nursing announced by the government last week.

Health minister Rosie Winterton said: “The time is right to provide mental health nurses with a new direction and clear future role in order to deliver government reforms such as the Mental Health Bill, personalised care and choice.” more

Lucky girl Rosie was Constituency Personal Assistant to John Prescott MP From 1980-1986. Educated at Doncastor Grammar she went on to study at Hull University.

Stop Press It’s Official Prescott and Hewitt!!!

John Prescott and James Hewitt are both known ‘love rats!’

Hewitt was having it off with the future King’s missus whilst low brow Prescott was knocking off his secretary.

It’s also been revealed today that a standards watchdog has said that Prescott could be investigated over his recent affair

“Sir Alistair Graham, head of the Committee on Standards on Public Life, said private behaviour was an issue only if it affected ministers’ jobs.

In this case issues might emerge because a civil servant was involved.

Sir Alistair added that if there had been any breach of civil service rules “I’m sure the Cabinet secretary will investigate them and deal with them appropriately”. more

Prescott’s Second Mistress Revealed!!!

the void can exclusively reveal the identity of Prezza’s second mistress.

After bribing journo’s to report that the bottleneck whale found in the Thames in January had died Prescott used his own personal winch to have the whale moved to his swimming pool in his secret mansion.

Prescott, who’s named his sweetheart Patricia is said to be overjoyed and doesn’t care who knows.

Meanwhile Patricia is believed it was rather the relationship was kept quiet as she seems slightly embarrassed by the whole affair.

Dismay as Scientists Reveal Fat, Blubbery Mass in Thames Not Prescott

Get your red mercury here!

Don’t buy anything off these guys!

the void has been clearing out our cupboards and are selling off a range of dangerous substances on the cheap to help pay the rent.

Don’t go to those part time arms dealers at the News of the Screws, here at the void we’ll do you a kilo of the stuff for a cool quarter of a mil’, undercutting dodgy fake Sheikh Mahmood by 50 grand.

We’ll also chuck in some polka dotted plutonium, a few ounces of kryptonite, a couple of lightsabres and a phaser for cash.

Mahmood’s entrapment plot was to pretend to flog fictional substance red mercury to a couple of heavily indebted middle men which was to be destined for an unnamed individual in the Middle East.

One of the defendents said at the time of his arrest “I am just a go-between. The guy phoned me and asked if I knew anyone who could get red mercury. I tried to arrange it because I am in so much debt.”

Mahmood as ever was happy to oblige arranging a sting operation in which the defendents were arrested.

Showing the true nature of Stalinist Britain this case has echoes of Soviet policies of entrapment. Some believe red mercury to have been invented by the KGB in order to lure gullible wannabe terrorists into deals with undercover spooks and ultimately to nick and convict them.

The arrests were made in September 2004, the same time that BBC series Spooks featured a plotline about a fictional sting involving terrorists attempting to gain red mercury. the void has no wish to speculate but wonders who the mysterious Middle Eastern buyer was working for, not that we’d suggest MI6 might get all their ideas off the telly like.

According to spyblog it’s Mahmood who should be facing charges under the ‘Anti-terrorism , Crime and Security Act 2001 Section 114 Hoaxes involving noxious substances or things’ which carries a maximum penalty of four years in the slammer.

(now keep it under yer hat but we got a genuine x-wing fighter in a lock up down croydon way, good as new geezer, only a couple of million light years on the clock)

the void sits back and awaits the knock of anti-terrorists cops on the door.

He ain’t heavy .. he’s my lover

The New Labour project appears to falling apart at the seams with daily scandals or sleaze, affairs and incompetence reminiscent of the dying days of the tories under Major.

Whilst crook Blair appears to be remaining quiet today he yesterday supported witless Charles Clark who has lost over 1,000 foreign criminals, some of whom were murderers and drug dealers “We don’t know exactly where everybody is” said Clark to the beeb yesterday.

We say let ‘em stay, they’ll probably fit in quite well.

Meanwhile Tracey Temple has gone into hiding after the excrutiating embarrassment of the whole country knowing she shagged John Prescott began to take hold.

Poor Tracey’s reputation is in tatters after it was revealed that for two years she was the love toy of clinically obese Prescott.

Meanwhile jealous blogger guido (who’s always secretly fancied the big lump himself according to sources) reckons there may be more scandals on the horizon for Prezza nicknaming him three shags.

the void reckons the odds of three seperate women being prepared to sleep with Prescott are about as likely as …

… labour winning the next election.

Conspiracists target 7/7 victims

Rachel from North London’s blog is temporarily out of action due to an infestion of counspiracy theorists who have accused her of being an MI5 spy amongst other things.

This would seem to be rather ironic, given that these laughingly called truthseekers fete David Shaylor and Anne Machon, two former spooks who are accepted without any question despite their nefarious past.

Now the void has no wish to smear Shaylor or Machon, they seem like perfectly nice and sincere people, and besides we have no evidence … but we do wondor what they are playing at associating themselves with this sorry shower. At best they could be described as delusional and confused misfits, at worst anti-semites and far righters using whatever tools they have to whip up hysteria against whomever their current ethnic scapegoat happens to be.

the void had the misfortune to attend a meeting of the London 9/11 ‘Truth’ Campaign and was heartily unimpressed. We’ll stop short of deconstructing what was said (not wanting to feel like an Evening Standard undercover hack) but can report that the words ‘illuminati’ and ‘financial cabal’ came up more than once without criticism.

To anyone lucky enough to be not in the know the illuminati were an 18th century society founded by Adam Weishaupt. Anti-religious and revolutionary, they were largely a response to the strict jesuit rule in Bavaria, and supported the ‘enlightenment’ and scientific ideals which were taking hold across much of Europe at the time. Some would say they were the good guys at a time of often brutal religious repression.

Anyway they got a bit too big for their boots and were banned with Weishaupt hot footing it out of the country. The existance and demise of this group is well documented and a matter of historical record, and is the only seriously documented evidence of a group called the illuminati.

This hasn’t stopped conspiracists of all stripes claiming the illuminati still exist, had a hand in the formation of the USA and the French and Russian Revolutions. This way of thinking was usually associated with right wing, Christian and reactionary forces, claiming the illuminati to be amongst other things devil worshippers, black magicians and in these post modern times shape shifting reptiles.

The dangers of ‘conspiracy theory’ came to prominence in the first half of this century with a campaign along similiar lines against the jews, culminating in the final solution of the nazi holocaust. It doesn’t take long if you dive into the conspiracists world to find veiled and open anti-semitism even today.

Anyway, back to our “truthseekers” who it seems have not only been spamming nonsense to Rachel from North London’s blog, but have also harrassed members of her family and sent e-mails which she herself has described as ‘vaguely threatening.’

You have to wonder at the psychology of those who would attack one of the victims of the 7/7 attacks whoever was ultimately responsible for the bombs.

Unlike the 9/11 campaign, where there are undoubtebly many questions to be answered, the poor nitwits this side of the Atlantic are really having to clutch at straws to find evidence of government complicity in 7/7 … because there isn’t any.

Largely basing their ramblings on a vague anomaly with the train times, which can be easily explained away by that most rare and sinister of creatures a late train they have little else to go on other than a possible warning that ex-Israeli supremo Netenyahu may or may not have received (he was close to Liverpool Street at the time).

Several of them turned up at the launch of anti-war activist Milan Rai’s most recent book where Rachel was also a speaker and showed themselves up by heckling and generally making a pain in the arse of themselves for no good reason. A good account of what happened can be found here.

It seems that far from being truthseekers they would rather shout down or censor anyone who disagrees with them, behaviour common in fundamentalists of all flavours.

Several links on their website lead to that most highly respected researcher Alex Jones, who’s most famous for infiltrating Bohemian Grove, an upmarket (think posh Butlins) holiday camp for CEO’s and Republican Party members. Jones was the first to reveal the appalling quality of the nightly in-house entertainment show and has dined out on it ever since.

Both 9/11 and 7/7 truthseekers will never gain any credibility whilst hanging out with the likes of Jones, who’s basically a redneck David Icke without the gags.

the void has said before we reckon 9/11 stinks, however it’s become an impossible subject to discuss due to the rantings of some of the most high profile ‘truthseekers’. A situation no doubt quite acceptable to any nefarious agents involved in 9/11 whether al Queda, the CIA or the Annunaki (don’t ask).

On a slightly different note the void happened across this site www (snapped) thetruthseeker .co.uk, a bog standard conspiracy site with the usual mix of anti-semitism, far right waffle and speculation presented as evidence. What concerned us here is that they claim Robert Fisk and John Pilger as columnists.

On closer examination this, like most of the rest of the site appears to be far from the truth, they merely seem to nick pieces Pilger and Fisk have written for more reputable organisations and claim them as their own.

We wonder if Pilger and Fisk are aware of this misrepresentation and plagiarism, you’d hope not ‘cos if they’ve put their names to this shambolic nonsense then they go on the Alex Jones/David Icke nutjob list as well.

Talking of Icke, he’s coming to Brixton on May 5th, if anyone wants to buy the void a ticket we’ll write a review of the gibbering reptile, but we ain’t paying to see him.